As a warning, this is just going to be a rant, so that I can just get it out of my system so that I can deal with something I don't want to deal with.
I currently work with a bully. She is an interesting bully, though, because face to face she appears to be super nice and cooperative and collaborative. But then she does the exact opposite behind your back. When you confront her on things, she completely denies them and explains them away like you must be CRAZY to even think that she would do such a thing! Except, she will lie to your face about things that you have in writing that you know she did. She is totally Dolores Umbridge, actually, right down to the fake sweetness.
And I am currently being Dolores Umbridged. And it is making me so. . .tired. I'm sooooo tired of the bullshit. I know I am out of here soon, and will never have to deal with her again, but I have some final stuff I have to work through with her, and it SUCKS. I am pushing back as much as I can and trying to advocate for what I think should happen, but I find at every turn that she is denying, denying, denying that there is a problem with anything, and then totally undermining me, and then pretending she isn't doing it. It is incredibly maddening to be trying to deal with a situation when someone pretends like there is no situation to your face, and then tries to undermine you behind your back. It's like she's insisting to my face that the emperor's new clothes are beautiful and there is no reason to do anything, and then behind my back she is trying to hire a tailor, and making sure everyone knows that she has found the tailor, and then telling everyone that I did nothing to try to get a tailor, and complaining about how terrible am I for not getting the tailor. Argh. The funny part is that we are not peers--she's a few levels up the ladder, so I totally don't get why she is behaving this way. It's not like we are in competition.
I just wish that people could see her for what she is. It's the second big thing I've had with her where she has pulled this, and I just don't get why this kind of behavior flies in any workplace. And I'm not the only one she is doing it to. It is such a bummer to see legitimately hard-working people crushed by this person, and to see this person nonetheless flourish on the backs of others that she has treated like crap. Let's hope that hell truly does have a special place for women who don't help other women.
1 comment:
So sorry you're putting up with this at work. I had a problem boss who was very Dolores like. It was the worst situation ever! Hang in there!
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