Tuesday, January 5, 2010

I Think It's Time to Circle the Wagons

Over the last few weeks, I feel like people (and by "people," I mean "relatives") have been doing their best to suck the life out of me. As much as they ask about the baby and I, it's never really about the baby. The conversation always moves on to their issues, and what they want/need/demand from me. I kept thinking that if I just dealt with whatever the issue was that they placed in front of me, we would move past it, and I could focus on what I need to focus on: the imminent arrival of our first child. Oh, how naive I was! It's just dragging on and on, with multiple people who have their own needs and wants, who are just selfish and oblivious.

I'm just so tired of the pettyness and the smallness. I'm tired of it sucking on my soul. I'm tired of trying to balance wrapping up work, the house chaos, and the baby preparations, and then having to deal with family issues on top of it. It's not fair to me or my baby, and I'm done with it.

The only question I have now is whether I should bother confronting the offenders, or just let it go. I think it will fester if I don't confront and get it out there. Argh. Either way, once I do that, I'm really done. I'm just going to stop answering the phone, pull the covers up over my head, and focus on my new little family.

On a happier note, one fact I forgot to mention yesterday: the ultrasound estimates the baby as being at 7 pounds 13 ounces--much bigger than I had expected! And, and the true spirit of TMI, I think I might've lost my mucous plug. I'm not sure exactly what it should look like, but if it is kind of clumpy and pinkish and mucous-y, then I saw it in the toilet tonight. We are really getting close!


Ji said...


Being important to others shall be a pleasure, what you need to do next is to get a balance, ask them to do what you want once for a while...
anyway, I wish you well on having a new baby.

happy 2010,
smile big,
feel funny,
live happily.


VA Blondie said...

You are getting close! Very exciting!

Good luck dealing with family. It can be a challenge.

JamieD said...

Oh, you are so close. Not because you lost your mucous plug but because you feel like everything around you is sucking the life from you. Two days before Cade was born, I was DONE. With everyone and everything.

I hate the family issues you are dealing with. My assvice would be - if it will affect your family, confront it. If not, let it go. When your little one is here, you'll forget about all the bullshit.

~Jess said...

I hate when people ask how you are, only because they REALLY want you to ask how they are...drives me nuts.

You're almost there! Any time now... :-)