Surgery, Again

I am sitting in the hospital waiting for my surgery. Ugh. I really don't want to do this. I am really hoping that the kidney looks good and all the doctor needs to do is remove the stent. But, there may be more stones that he needs to work on, or there may be more weird tissue that needs to be removed. I'm seriously hoping that is not the case, though. I had to come to the hospital by myself, which I'm really bummed about. I'm such a baby, but I hate being here alone. We didn't have anyone to stay with the kids, though--one of the major downsides of living so far from family is stuff like this. All of our friends are working, so we didn't have any other options. My sister offered to try to take the day off, but she just started her first "real" job and we didn't want her to do that. This hospital cracks me up, though (in a "what have I gotten myself into" kind of way). It's private, so the toiletries in the bathroom (yes, there are toiletries in the hospital bathroom) are Moulton Brown, and the room service menu (yes, there's a room service menu) has a decent wine list (yes, wine list. Post-surgical Shiraz, anyone?) But, they've clearly outsourced the nursing care, because my nurse is wearing the shirt of some local staffing firm. She didn't weigh me, but rather asked what I weighed (uh, don't they need that to be accurate to give me anaesthesia?). She asked what drugs I'm allergic to (dear lord, is is my second surgery here in a month-isn't that info in my chart), and when I told her, she WROTE IT ON HER HAND!!! When she took my blood pressure, there was obviously something wrong with the machine or the disposable cuff that she used, because it didn't deflate and my hand soon went numb. It finally spit out a number (117/74, I think), but I don't think it was accurate, since mine is never, ever that high. "Perfect!" she declared. She just insisted on doing a pregnancy test despite my protestations that there is zero chance that I am pregnant. She didn't seem to understand how it was possible I had a baby 4 months ago and haven't had my period. "You haven't bled?," she said, as though The problem was my lack of familiarity with the word "menses" when she originally asked the question. Obviously, breastfeeding isn't big wherever she is from (she is foreign, as are most of the nurses I've encountered here). And then she gave me a test tube to provide my urine sample in. I confess that my aim is not good enough to deposit a sample in something the diameter of my thumb. Oh, and she put a label on it, too, so that the lab could also enjoy the fruits of my labor. I removed the label before I proceeded to pee all over the container, then wiped the container off and replaced the label, because that's the kind of classy girl that I am. And finally, I got the room right next to the nursing station, where the staff apparently gathers and yells to one another. I think I'm really going to like it here. :)