Saturday, April 26, 2008

Yet Another Doctor

I went back to my GP yesterday about the GI issues. She took blood, did a urine screen (I might also have a UTI--isn't it FUN to try something new and different!), gave me a stool card, put me on antibiotics for TWO MORE WEEKS, AND referred me to a GI specialist. As a prize, I got a bandaid advertising Gardisil. It seems like I should've at least qualified for the plastic model of genital warts, after all of that, but all I got was the crummy advertisement. The nurse didn't even have the decency to laugh when I joked about getting a piece of the action for wearing HPV vaccine advertising on my body. Later on, the doctor also told me I should feel lucky that my condition isn't worse. Yes, it was just another fine day in the medical neighborhood.

I don't think I have high standards when it comes to my medical professionals. I want them to a) correctly diagnose my problem, and b) treat me in a way that improves my health. I don't expect my doctor to give me her home phone number, hug me, or taking me shopping when I'm feeling down. I know there are children starving in Africa and people with health plights much worse than mine. So you can call me selfish and needy if you want, but I just don't find it helpful to have a doctor tell me I should feel lucky that I'm not worse when I feel like crap. When I rhetorically ask why the universe hates me, as I am wont to do when I haven't been allowed to drink for weeks, work is overflowing on my desk, and I'm feeling lousy, please don't take this as an actual question that needs answering, and please don't do so in the tone my father reserved for lectures about my curfew. Please just smile understandingly--indulgently, even--and pull out the prescription pad or tequila bottle, as the situation may warrant.

Enough whining. In other news, we have been scrutinizing The Map every night in bed. We have come up with a list of countries that we either a) really would like to visit, or b) are simply intrigued by, and we want to know more about. Here's the list so far:

1. The US by RV
2. Central America
3. Brazil
4. Hawaii
5. The Galapagos Islands
6. Tanzania
7. Madagascar
8. Greece/Turkey/Croatia
9. Sweden/Finland/Norway/Denmark
10. India
11. Vietnam
12. Bali
13. Australia
14. Fiji
15. Japan
16. Egypt

We will be limited by cost, and also by the fact that I refuse to go anywhere cold. Given that the trip will fall somewhere between November and February, this immediately shortens the list. I haven't yet told Terrific T that I refuse to go anywhere cold. He likes the cold, but I'm sure I can win him over with my enormous charm and constant whining.

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